Lights out at the Furnace

It's official. Yesterday Bruce Collins, head of New Wine Cymru, came to see me to tell me that there would be no Furnace at next year's summer conference.

I have mixed feelings about it.

The vision of the NWC leadership is to make the main meetings younger; so a "young adults" venue works against that. I get that. And given that they have just ended the association of Ignite with the conference (Ignite have run the youth work at this conference for a decade) and that the Furnace was very much part of the Ignite work, it is I suppose an obvious time to make a break.

I regret that the NWC Exec made leadership decisions about areas of the conference that some of us have worked very hard to make work, areas where we have sought vision and then laboured to make vision reality, where we have given up a lot of precious time in order to serve others, and where lives have been richly blessed - that they made leadership decisions about these areas without involving those of us who have taken responsiblility for leading those areas in the decision making process. There is an element in this where it slightly feels like we are viewed as competent to work, but not to pray. Leaders in name, but workers in fact.

I have been asked to be involved in next year's conference. There will be a late night cafe attached to the main venue, aimed at (but not exclusive to) the young, single adults. This will have live music, and also some "chat show" element, possibly debate, possibly a bar as well as a cafe. The team attached to it will be charged with bringing in singles on site. There will be some seminars aimed at (but not exclusive to) younger people.

It makes my heart sink, not rise.

I am being asked to be a chat show host or a bar manager; a pastor to singles (God help us - that's a concept I, who run a family church, find totally distasteful); and to look at seminars for the young people.

This year I was a leader of a stream of the conference, a host, a speaker, an inspirer, a worshipper, a Bible teacher, a prophet, a leader of prayer ministry, a counsellor, a chat show host, a entertainer, an encourager, someone under authority who asked for something to be done and it was done. Through working all day every day with a group of people we built relationships that made some difference in God's Kingdom. And then others joined us for our late nights, and I hope they were touched too, but that was different.

Next year I am being asked to work as hard (no Ignite team to do all the logistics) for just the people in that last sentence, in the hope there will be more of them. I'm sure there will be. I'm sure that entertaining them and giving them space at the end of the day is a really good thing to do.

But this year all the work we did changed lives. It's a hard thing not to think that either what we did was not understood by the NWC leadership, or that having been understood, I've just been offered a serious step down.

I am reminded of how humble Andy Booth is: working so gently at the worship leading, when he is capable of so much more than so many of the people around him there. Doing what he is asked to, and making no comment. A godly man. Of course, he also finds it a welcome break from what he usually does, a refreshing time to be able to put aside all his usual responsibilities. He does not need the recognition of these folk he comes to serve so willingly.

I have a lot to learn from that.

I did not say no. Partly because I like Bruce Collins so much, partly because I don't want to cut my ties with NWC, partly because I wonder if I want some recognition.

I think I am going to say no. Because I have a role here at St Catherine's that is more important than any other call on me and on my time; and when things come in that correlate with my major ministry giftings - worship, Bible teaching, outreach opportunities - I will look and see if they are things that I should be giving time to. Otherwise, vanity invitations need to receive a warm "thank you" and a gentle "no, thank you".

I am still praying it through. Because I like Bruce... Which is not enough reason to say yes to this.

And if I should still be involved with NWC, it will happen. But not this way, I think.

(Later)

I wrote and declined Bruce's offer for next year's conference. I'm sure that as my heart sinks, somebody else's will rise, and that person will be right for the job. If I said yes, I would be stepping in that person's way.

I feel sad that what is past is past.

But glad that I have done the right thing; this was not for me. I left my letter by saying that if I could help in any other way Bruce should ask, I wanted to do so, and that if the Lord is blessing us here, we as a church remain committed to sharing that wherever we may. My continued prayer is for growth on the work of New Wine Cymru.